Been there

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Posts by Been there

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  17

  Alone in a house full of people

  by LovesDubs in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  for those of you still married to a jw...have you ever felt like you were living alone even tho there is a person on the other side of the bed?

  i sure do...he has this whole "secret life" and all his jw friends and jw relatives and wont have anything to do with my friends or my relatives, even tho most of them never were jws....so we dont do anything together as a couple.

  i mean zip.

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  Been there

  LD,

  I totally know how you feel and am eagerly reading your replies. My husband has never been a witness but I know the loneliness. He can be sitting in the same room and the loneliness being with someone who is suppose to be a partner, part of a team, your companion, your mate sits so heavy on your chest. I long to be happy. I long to be loved.

  I think if your husband truely loved and respected you he could not use this as an excuse. It is his permission to treat you like crap. It has nothing to do with being a JW, or sort of JW. Try doing the counceling so you know you did your best (even if it is by yourself). If he won't then he does'nt want it fixed he wants you to call it quits because he can't be the bad guy and do it. Sounds like he wants out but does'nt have the balls to do it. If you decide to call it quits have all your ducks in a row first (if you don't already). Get a credit card in just your name and start some credit. Get a checking account in just your name. Do a slow fade and not DA.

  I almost wish my husband would hit me, or I could prove he cheated on me...........that I could totally walk away from, but the slow emotional stranglation is killing me. How do you fight back with "Your the only one who thinks somethings wrong" or "That's just your opinion" or "It's just in your head"...............I AM NOT CRAZY!

  Please know that you have company in your boat.........you are not alone. Best wishes to you.

  Been There (still there)
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  58

  New member

  by Winston Smith :>D in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just wanted to say hi to the group here.. been baptized for 15 years now.

  my wife has been baptized for a little less than that time period.. been an aux poi., reg pio, ms. wife is a reg pio currently.

  now im just a lowly publisher :d. have had many doubts over the years on small matters.

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  Been there

  Welcome to our (not always so) humble forum!

  You have much knowledge and the ability to find it............there are always people here that need what you have to offer. I am of the lazy class that couldn't remember a date if my life depended on it, so history was not my strong subject. I was raised a JW but it just never felt right to me with or without dates.

  Consider yourself lucky er--um fortunate to have found this forum so early in your exit. It will save you many many years of uncertainty and guilt feelings about leaving "GOD'S" organization. That you were somehow defective and could not be perfect like everyone else. This is a healing place, and a place for you to say out loud what you are thinking, to see if it makes sense. You will find many here where you are, where you have been and where you are going. You are among friends! We are not evil apostates (most of us anyway). We are searchers of our truth, what ever that may be.
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  9

  Thank you (referring to previous message)

  by Juliana in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am very inexperienced with message boards, so had to start a new branch of conversation, not knowing how to reply within the same one ... if that makes any sense.

  i thank everyone for their offers of private discussions, and i would certainly be grateful to have people to talk to ... the thing is, i haven't yet worked out how to do this!.

  your advice was really invaluable.

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  Been there

  Juliana, welcome!

  Like they said you can still hang around here if you would like. Congratulations on making a wise, well thought out decision. I think you will have a long and happy (unJW) life. You are a strong woman to be able to realize danger and do what you have to (painful as it may be) to avoid it. No man is worth the hell you would have lived in. Bless you for saving your future children of the pain and torment of being raised a JW. Best wishes to you now on your continued journey..................
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  23

  Are you older than dirt?

  by Lady Lee in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  somebody sent me this email.

  i thought the older ones would enjoy the memories, and the younger might enjoy hearing about the strange and simple times of their elders.

  graylen.

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  Been there

  I am older then Dirt

  I don't know #10 and #9 is either a wagon or high top sneakers?

  I hated party lines as a teen.............had to limit phone calls to friends to 10 mins.

  My first drive in movie memory.........THE ANTS do you know how scary a 50 foot ant is to a 4 yr. old?

  Does anyone remember what the yellow stamps were besides the S&H green stamps? They were alittle larger I think. We collected both. Guess who got to lick & stick
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  5

  I love my Mum (fluffy again)

  by ScoobySnax in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well i do .......just had to post that, she has got to be the best mum in the world.

  i watched her today when i popped round there, the minute i got there she had the fridge open offering all sorts of different concoctions of food that she could make me, if i so wanted.

  the kettle was on, coffee was made, she asked me if i was ok, and knew after about 10 minutes that i wasn't feeling quite myself, without me saying a thing.. she handed me some photo's that i only just looked at, they were of me in infant school all circa 1976, and some of us in happy family times on fun days out when we were kids.

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  Been there

  Scubby,

  That is so sweet of you to let everyone know how much you love her. Does SHE know? It feels soooooo good to have someone who loves you like your "MUM" loves you. Thanks for sharing your feelings about her.
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  12

  Introducing Kelpie to dubs at the mall.

  by BLISSISIGNORANCE in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, not face to face...........after all she is df'ed.

  lol.

  kelpie and i had some fun at our local mall yesterday.

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  Been there

  Spot the Dub.....I like that! My husband and I went out to breakfast/lunch at Pondarosa's (a buffet style steak house for you out of towners) a couple weekends ago with my daughter and family. We were in the smoking section. About halfway through the meal about 20 people came in. Young and old (with walker). They just oooooooooooooozed of JW. Being seated in the smoking section they immediately gathered up all the (empty) ashtrays and set them on a table that was not in use. They touched them with such distain. Where did they put their chewed gum? Why did they make such a spectical? Was it to say that even though they all sat in the smoking section (you get seated faster) they did not want to be associated with smoking and how rightous they were? Moving an empty piece of glass will not protect them from second hand smoke.

  I informed my husband and daughter that they were JW's. They wanted to know how I knew. Ya just know. They had that 80's look. I felt sorry for the only teenage girl (looked like she wanted to be invisable) and the young gentleman (elder in training) of about 8 in his three piece suit. The whole group reminded me of prisoners at meal time sitting in a big hall not allowed to talk to each other. They just ate. Didn't talk much, didn't laugh. Yuck. Looked like robots sitting there eating in unison. Yep I can still spot a witness when I see one (or 20). Wish I had the nerve to ask......are you Jehovah's Witnesses? Would have made their day being such fine examples to us worldly people. Gag!

  Sorry didn't mean to steal your thread Bliss. Spot the Dub just reminded me.

  I didn't notice if they all prayed. I'm sure they did.
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  22

  How old do you feel?

  by JH in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  some people look younger than their age and also feel younger than their age.

  and some people look and act older than their age.

  although i'm 43, i feel like 25. i do the same things and think the same way as i did then, but with a bit more experience which helps me not to repeat certain errors of life.

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  Been there

  Everybody says I look younger then I am. I boogle their minds when I say I have 6 grandkids. I do feel old however. I am married to a stick in the mud so we rarely have any kind of fun. We don't play and I think that ages you both physically and mentally. I do let loose with my granddaughter though, noone thinks your weird if you have a kid with you.
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  5

  Anyone having web page trouble here?

  by be wise in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when i click to view a thread or more often a topic (usually active topics) a load of jumbled up letters and symbols appear instead of the usual web page.

  does this happen to anyone else?

  pleeeasse help!

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  Been there

  I also was having the problem and found out that when you get the scrambled stuff, if you hit your back button while in the page it takes you to the topics, then hit the forward button it goes back to the page and it is right. So it takes a couple steps but you do get to read it.

  And a big thanks to ??? (can't remember who) who told everyone how to keep up with new pages instead of 3 new ones every 2 days. It works great for me!
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  4

  Anyone From Kentucky? Time for a bath!

  by Stephanus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  apparently in kentucky it is on the state statute books that every kentuckian must bathe at least once a year.

  anyone from kentucky about to fulfill that legal requirement soon?

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  Been there

  WoW I almost forgot..........................Thanks for reminding me Steph. I have it marked on my calendar. That reminds me of my Grandpa. My Granny would drag him kicking and screaming every Saturday evening for a bath. (he was Canadian)

  Seriously, I haven't had a bath in a couple years. My tub is too small for a good bath.
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  20

  This is a picture of my son

  by kenpodragon in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this is what my son looks like.

  some people here might remember me, i have not posted in about seven months or so, on this site.

  i thought i would share my sons photo with everyone.. .

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  Been there

  Welcome back Kenpo. I missed your posts. You do have a way with words. Always got me to thinking and thats a good thing!

  I often wondered how it all went with the baby on the way. Glad all is well with you and your family. Such a cute little guy. Please stick around and give us some more of your thoughts.